Where’d my motivation go?

Where’d my motivation go?

So I’m sitting on my living room floor, with my niece in the playpen, my baby asleep in her excersaucer (yes, I left her in there to sleep!) and my son playing with legos. My kitchen is a mess, I have 2 loads of laundry to put away, 2 large bags of hand-me-down baby clothes to sort and see what I want, a messy living room…oh, and now that I’m thinking of it, I have taxes to do, dinner to prep for, health insurance applications to fill out…I am exhausted just thinking about it! And to top it off, I got not sleep last night, then both Aidan (2) and Kaytlin (6 months) woke up at 4:30 this morning. Needless to say, I have lost my motivation for the day! At least I got my nephew off to Kindergarten on time!

I read lots of tips on how to be a not grumpy mommy, how to keep a clean, organized home, how to keep kids entertained (without using the t.v.), and how to find “me” time in the day. Well, all that goes out the window when you can’t sleep! My kids mostly sleep through the night (go to be around 8 or 9, very rarely 10), and wake up around 6 or 7. I work until about 9:45 p.m. 5 nights a week, get home around 10, wake Kaytlin up to feed her once to make sure she doesn’t wake up un the middle of the night hungry, then I clean the dishes I didn’t get to during the day, straighten up, get clothes ready for the next day, and I get to bed. That’s usually around midnight, occasionally 1 a.m. I have trouble sleeping, thinking of everything I didn’t get to during the day. By the time I get so tired that I HAVE to sleep, it’s time for me to get up. My sister drops her kids off sometime between 6:15 a.m. and 8:45 a.m. depending on what day it is. I like to be fully dressed and partially awake when they get here. Then of course, they are always hungry and ready for breakfast when they get here, and it never fails, my niece needs a diaper change immediately, and conveniently that’s around the same time Kaytlin wakes up and wants to be nursed, which coincides with when Aidan wakes up and wants to cuddle…I run around cleaning up after 4 kids (including Kaytlin, she’s rolling now and tearing up any piece of paper she can find), 2 kids get picked up around 5:30, I have 30 minutes to nurse Kaytlin again and get ready for work. Then I either wait for my husband to get home, or drop my kids off somewhere so I can start work at 6:30. I really don’t think this is what life’s supposed to like. I’m going to have to talk to God about my schedule!

I am looking for some motivation here! Ideally, I would like to sleep at least a solid 5 hours (solid being the key word, not waking up to night sweats, dry throat, headache, etc.) Okay, 6 hours would be better, 7 would be best. But, I’ll take the 5! I would love to be able to get up at least an hour before my kids, so I can exercise, have quiet time with a cup of coffee, prepare breakfast, and straighten up before they get out of bed. Oh, and maybe getting to chat with my husband before he’s off to work would be nice too, since we don’t get a chance to later in the day. I leave for work when he comes home, and he’s usually asleep when I get home.

Anyone in a similar situation? Any tips on what I can/should do so I don’t pull my hair out? Speaking of which, I’m about 12 months over due for a hair cut!